you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
Randomize
