Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Randomize
