Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Never doubt me. I am drunk and unstoppable and I will finish this book
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
