My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Randomize
