I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize
