...so i touched it.
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I have aggressive nipples.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
