so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
10 Things Your Gyno Wants You To Stop Doing To Your Vagina
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
For Some Reason, Boys Are Singing The ‘Halo’ Theme Song In School Bathrooms
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow