party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
Randomize
