Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
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I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
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Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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