I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Randomize
