why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
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