i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
Randomize
