Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I'm so fucking centered right now
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
