how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I just recognized Courtney in a crowded Trader Joe's solely by seeing her ass. In other news, I survived the first round of layoffs today.
I'm not sure which feat is more impressive...
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
