you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
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