if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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