Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize
