i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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