why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
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