yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Randomize
