I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
These 23 Groupies Had The Most Insane Sexual Experiences With Celebs
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
35 Of The Funniest Things People Said While Banging
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.