Texts From Last Night

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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Everytime we come here you have an ex here.

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  (985): Everytime we come here you have an ex here. http://tfl.nu/ev6m
  Replies (16) Good night (623) Bad night (1055)
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  (845): View more from New York

  He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?

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  (845): He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right? http://tfl.nu/rwt1
  Replies (37) Good night (836) Bad night (6801)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...

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  (202): did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this... http://tfl.nu/5zp7
  Replies (29) Good night (1437) Bad night (5321)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out

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  (989): you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out http://tfl.nu/f2m2
  Replies (24) Good night (1109) Bad night (5850)
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.

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  (612): Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place. http://tfl.nu/cfbh
  Replies (19) Good night (1135) Bad night (4904)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.

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  (775): Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I. http://tfl.nu/56to
  Replies (3) Good night (1297) Bad night (2670)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.

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  (401): Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself. http://tfl.nu/agcx
  Replies (3) Good night (2334) Bad night (950)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.

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  (484): the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished. http://tfl.nu/p2b9
  Replies (7) Good night (5579) Bad night (1145)
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  (260): View more from Indiana

  Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?

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  (260): Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers? http://tfl.nu/8xa0
  Replies (4) Good night (579) Bad night (1771)
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  Drink for every country you've never heard of.

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Fuuuuuuuuuck

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  (815): Drink for every country you've never heard of. (630): Fuuuuuuuuuck http://tfl.nu/g5f9
  Replies (9) Good night (2808) Bad night (767)
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!

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  (901): You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?! http://tfl.nu/9kiq
  Replies (5) Good night (1273) Bad night (483)
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.

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  (517): Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you. http://tfl.nu/sh0v
  Replies (1) Good night (400) Bad night (668)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.

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  (770): I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos. http://tfl.nu/mg7r
  Replies (4) Good night (525) Bad night (785)
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  (518): View more from New York

  Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school

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  (518): Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school http://tfl.nu/e9wg
  Replies (1) Good night (762) Bad night (335)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.

  (1-317): View more from Indiana

  You really know how to show Monday who's boss.

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  (317): Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together. (1-317): You really know how to show Monday who's boss. http://tfl.nu/h3k4
  Replies (0) Good night (694) Bad night (231)

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