Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(765): View more from Indiana

he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.

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(513): View more from Ohio

I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.

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(804): View more from Virginia

finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.

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23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce
Read it at the TFLN blog
(580): View more from Oklahoma

Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one

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(763): View more from Minnesota

Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.

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(803): View more from South Carolina

He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.

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(270): View more from Kentucky

What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...

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(925): View more from California

I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY

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