...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
