Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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