Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
21 Of The Most Regrettable Tattoo Ideas Ever
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them