We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....