y did u give ur computer a hand job?
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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