i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
I made him laugh his dick is mine
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
there is another microwave in the elevator.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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