Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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