Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
