New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
