I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
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