My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
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