just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Randomize
