Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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