"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Were you rubbing your penis on me while I slept? I smell like penis.
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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