Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
Randomize