he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
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I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
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If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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