A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
