but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
No I am not eating basil off your cock
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
