We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
