dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
