Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
