Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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