So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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