my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
composition of my stomach right now: 60% C8H10N4O2 * H2O (coffee), 20% CaCO3 (pepto bismol/tums), 10% HCl (stomach acid), 5% fried rice, 5% residual adderall. i can do that by percent mass too. fuck you finals.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Randomize
