I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
tell me how i ended up in the movie theater alone with a bottle of smirnoff and a bendy straw.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Randomize
