just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize