To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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