you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
it's great music for shaving your balls
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!