Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
ugly people sure do ruin things
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Did everyone make it back alive?
You say that with such hope.
Is that a no?
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
