He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize
